Today, the ACLU San Diego filed a lawsuit against the UCSD administration and Associated Students citing freedom of the press and freedom of speech violations. As the news broke and reporters and journalists from around the world honed in on UCSD’s campus, media outlets and legal historians quickly realized the gravity of the ensuing “trial of the century.”
Not even OJ killing two more people could top this #TrialOfTheCentury-Fox News
“The trial of the fucking century” tweeted CNN earlier today in response to the announcement. Fox News then replied, “Not even OJ killing two more people could top this #TrialOfTheCentury.”
On a more serious note, The Koala reached out to famous legal historian, Seymour Booke, who commented, “What we are seeing here is a legitimate ‘trial of the century.’ Past media frenzies surrounding large-scale trials pale in comparison to The Koala vs. UCSD Administrators and I don’t think any future case will either. So buckle up and bring some floaties because this Shit-Storm is about to turn into a Shit-Hurricane.”
This morning The Koala visited OJ Simpson, the once king of high profile court cases, who commented, “I’ll fucking stab you like I did my ex-wife that bitch-ass waiter … in my book If I Did It” then aggressively slammed the prison telephone. Robert Kardashian, know by many through his involvement in Mr. Simpson’s trial followed up with The Koala through an angrily-worded email, stating “You better not make a sex tape and try to profit off this.” Don’t worry Mr. Kardashian, we will. Ray J just hit us up and we’re already casting for the film. Who needs AS funds when you can just make a porno with a B-list celebrity!
The Koala will continue to bring up to date coverage of this once in a lifetime event through the summer and into the next academic year so stay tuned.